stressed to the point of a MELTDOWN!

listening to : avril lavigne - together
mood : plain
current status : worried

ok.. here's the sizzle.. tomorrow school is starting again.. for some FREAKING reason.. I have been waiting for tomorrow for the past 2 weeks.. I can't believe I MISS school.. yes people.. the word is MISS.. U can miss childhood.. or your sister who is not at home.. or Harry Potter.. BUT NOT SCHOOL!!!! school is not MISS-able.. MISS and SCHOOL does NOT go together in a sentence.. haih.. I guessed I have been brain washed.. by what? only my inner child knows.. (yes I have one)

well.. now.. the clock ticks.. only 10 minutes till 14th June.. school day.. and now.. I DON'T FEEL LIKE GOING TO SCHOOL!! Yes this is how I should feel.. but it suck that I have to feel like this NOW!! 8 minutes to 12.00am. haih... and now its just bad.. I mean.. ok.. I can't do anything about it and yes farisa! THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE BEEN WANTING FOR THE PAST 14 DAYS!! I just wish I could turn back time..

well for once.. I didn't study at all this holiday.. ok ok.. maybe a little.. A LITTLE! LITTLE.. little means.. small.. not much.. sikit.. a small amount.. haih... this is bad... I mean.. so much for.. "I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE THIS HOLIDAY COZ I'M GONNA STUDY FOR 2 WEEEKS!!" scoffs.. yeah.. right..

and now.. It just got to me.. I'VE GOT EXAM IN 2 WEEKS AND ALL I'VE COVERED IS science form2.. WHAT THE!! and PMR is coming.. PMR! It sucks coz I am not acting like I'm sitting for this exam this year.. I've been goofing around for the past 5 months.. GOD!! I feel like killing myself so I don't have to take that exam.. its too much preasure..

why do they make us take tests.. to test your knowledge.. can't they accept the fact that some of us.. is not smart! (ME!!) haih.. they're only preasuring us.. and I wonder why teenagers have been smoking.. scoffs.. haih..

and I just got of reading atikah's blog and she said sumthing that got me thinking.. I have a reputation in my family to keep.. my sister and cousin got 8 A's.. and all my family members are ready to see those bright shiny 5 stars 8 A's.. and thinking about it now.. I can't give them that.. haih.. this is killing me.. I mean.. I can't do it..

There is no such thing as optimistic in real life.. I guess tahts my problem.. I've been living in my dreams.. my fantasy.. that my problem.. TOO MANY TOO MANY PROBLEMS!! ok.. I'm gonna break this off! I'm stepping out of happy land.. and back to REALITY! god help me!!

- does anyone know where Einstein's grave is? I need his help on building this time machine..