our HAPPY ending!

listening to : jojo - leave (get out)
mood : frustrated
current status : eyes hurt bad!

this was it! The last day of school! The day most of us (somehow) DON'T LOOK FORWARD TO!! (at least not this year)

For some of you who don't agree with what I said and will go all 'WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH THIS GIRL!?'

Well, I've only got one thing to say to you.

This year has been the best year for a lot of us and this is the actual year where we all find our true friends.

Its true.

For me, this has been the year where I've actually realize how much fun life as a teenager could be. I have found great friends who has my back, and has actually put up with my nonsence the whole year! I have never felt so happy after the end of the year!

But then, theres always a downside to everything. And that is, the last day of school. We've all planned to come so that we can have the whole 'last day of school gala celebration!'. And we actually did. It was fun.

I came to school feeling ahppy and sad at the same time. Running through my mind was how much I love all my friends and glad that this has been a successful year, and also the fact that we have to move on. We have to undertake next year, Form 4! No more hanging out at Syed whenever we want, and no more going out to bake cookies (or even crack cookies) and no more just staying at a friend's house playing guitar and making a fool of ourselves. Its a lot harder this year and everyone knows it.

I got to school and we all started to arrive one by one. After most of us were here, we started our whole 'SIGNING GALORE' (as Atikah likes to say it) again.. For some of us who didn't come the other days, its their turn. Shameen couldn't make it and she don't know how much she've missed. And Fawwaz almost didn't come. We had to call him so he would get his butt up to school. But after he came, we're all just too happy to see him to even care that he's late.

The atmosphere of the day didn't feel so 'last day of school like'. Well for once, at one point, I was actually staring at blank space. Me, Hamiza and Atikah even actually recorded us singing a part of the 'Kiss Me' song. BOREDOME YOU KNOW!! hahah! It was pretty good. Giggles.

Me, Diana and Atikah also had a round of Uno Kelam Kabut. After that, we all went to the Taman Gemilang to say goodbye to it. Me and the girls just sat there and taking pictures and videos. Gg didn't feel so good so we all went back to class so she could rest.

Not feeling so satisfied with the whole last day atmosphere, I mean, no one is doing anything. Ok they are, but they're doing their own shtuff (again quote from Atikah). So me and Atikah decided to go for a round of the Spit Game. The unbeatable Champion thank you very much! Hahahah! We ended playing about almost 10 games before we're actually satisfied.

Iqbal seemed fascinated by our playing so he decided to start a game of Spit with Shahrul using Fawwaz's card. In the middle of the game, it was confiscated. Me and Gg tried to defend for our right to actually bring it, but that prefect seems too bitchy too care. Ooops!

Feeling a bit frustrated, I dared Iqbal to a game of Spit, since he was winning agains't Shahrul earlier. Its either he's really good, or Shahrul just really suck at it. Hahahah!! Well, me and Iqbal played 2 games. I was winning on the first game, and most of the guys were all, 'apa lah kau nih Iqbal! Kalah ngan perempuan doh!' Hahahha! But then, IQBAL CHEATED!!! And he wont the game. I didn't feel like arguing so I challenged him to another.

I won this time. Hehehh. But the game took a long time! I mean, LONG! About half and hour or longer like that. After that, the guys got into 'BUILD BACK HOGWARTS' mode. Whats that you ask!? Well, my cards were Harry Potter cards, and the guys were building a card castle out of it. Therefor, its Hogwarts (according to Aizat la that is)! It took a long time too. Most of us were holding our breathes, especially when it comes down to the final 10! It was scary!! Not to mention Pressuring!

But when its done, we were all so proud of it. The builders group consists of Shahrul, Iesqo, Aizat and Iqbal. We took pictures of the whole thing and after that, Iman recorded the 'downfall of Hogwarts'. It was pretty cool! Me and the girls decided to play Uno after that and the guys have disappeared god knows where! I've finished my cards when Fawwaz came running behind me (as I was sitting at the door) and shocked us with his bleeding arm!

Now we know where the guys have gone to! They went to make their owh version of 'Jackass - Part 2 = Falling from the Roof'. Thats how Fawwaz got his scar. All of the guys scattered around and were to meet up again in the class. When they all were gathered, Fawwaz proudly showed of his new earned scar.

It was almost time by then so we all decided to go to the 'secret place' as we like to call it. We can't carve our name on the tree coz we didn't have a carver. So we settled with the next best thing, writing our names and our 'aka's on the tembok there. There were loads of names there. A group of Form 3 teenagers writing a memoir on the school. Leaving away memories and smiles and probably a little publisity in the years to come. Giggles.

I also made a new friend today. A little yellow bug named (after me) Bernie. I mena, it fits a bug much more then it fits me I'm telling yah! I couldn't stop looking at it and I loved it. And can you believe some people are actually disgusted by bugs and worms. THEY'RE SO CUTE!! They really are. They don't even bite or have creepy cute eyes that can stare at you like they want to eat you. LIKE CATS FOR INSTANCE. GAH!!! Yucks.

Niena came to the rescue when she joined all 16 of us for a photoshot. We had to take about 12 pictures with the same pose. Now I know how hard it is to be a star and smile all the time. But it was fun to have all of us together in our group picture.

And all of us got into 'this is it! the last day of school' mode after thats all done. Some of us are going away next year.. Tasnim, Atikah and Ainul (maybe) are moving away from the school. And at that moment, all of us were as if struck by the 'realization thunder' and we all got into this moment where we all started to cry and hugging each other and the whole speech on how we're to miss everyone! And I realize, I tried hard to imagine my life without 2 of my best friends. Its as if a part of my life is moving away. And this of course made me cry harder.

We all just hanged out at the secret place till the end of school. And by then, we all stayed back. But then one by one of us had to leave. And at last, its left with me, Shahrul, Hamiza, Diana, Atikah, Tasnim, Gg, Fawwaz and Iesqo. We all just hanged out there, basically talking. We left at about 2.30pm. And by then, all of us were tired but feels as if we don't want to leave. As if we don't want to leave this year.

We don't want to leave the precious memories we've shared. Sweet laughters, joy and sadness. All of the things we've done together that didn't mean so much to us before, has suddenly turned into this huge thing where you just won't let go off. You just want to hold on to it forever. All those moments and those events we had. All those dumb things we did, all those funny jokes we shared, all those times where we all just goofed around. Everything. It just seems as if we're leaving a thing so beautiful that if we let go, we might never get it back.

The pictures we've taken, the sorrow we left behind, they're one of the most important part of our lives. And theres nothing anyone of us can do, except to cherish it as best as we can, because we have to leave it at one point, and to start a whole new year. A whole new story! To re-do what we did this year, and to add in more plots. MOre actions. And definitely more characters in it. And then will this story be a bestseller. We're our own person, and we are in charge of our story. And the two things you need most to make it great, is a good personality and a great group of friends.

That is why I plan to reach for the goal. Balance. Practice perfection, not missing on any social outings, make new friends and hold on to the ones I've already had, and still have time to put in on my studies. Thats my goals for next year. For the year 2004. For the year where new beginnings will arise and more smiles put into it. More memroies to share, laughters and sorrows, and most important of all, to always be yourself. (unless yourself is OMar) haahh. Just kidding.

And thats another thing. I'm to forgive everyone I've ever had a grudge on, and to not judge people by their first impression, or base on other people's impressions. I am to get to know them before I would to judge them. And I know I'll have supports at the back. I know that if I ever were pushed backwards, all my 15 best friends will get my back. No matter what.

And there is one thing left I want to say before I close this year. We've been concentrating on how much we'd miss Tasnim, Atikah and Ainul. I mean, what about me!? I might be leaving too. But its just a might. But to think, I might actually be leaving the school next year and didn't even get my hugs and kisses and tears. But no matter. We're not dying right anytime soon right?

- If tears were to be paid for, I'll waste any of them on my friends!!