very LONG with a HINT of emoness

The room was lit with nothing more than the light from the computer screen. And the only sound that could be heard was the silent tapping of the keyboards. Even the birds and the cats have gone to sleep but I stay awake feeling down. A sudden realization have coated my head and I can't break free from the dull feeling. I switched on my Blogger and commanded that a new post should be written. I wish to recite the thing that is bothering me in hope that it will loosen up the feeling. I can't stand it anymore..

I MISS DIANA and all our crazy moments jogging in the morning to prep up for prom night.

I MISS ATIKAH and all our English literature madness talking in totally wrong English accent.

I MISS GG and all the times we shared in the classroom making fun of teachers and bad mouthing the non-favourable kids in the form.

I MISS MIZA and all our outings when we conquer the 2 boys and also worked it in the changing room.

I MISS FARHAH for all her unique faces and retardedness in school.

I MISS SHAMEEN for the times we used to have walking to tuition under the rain and went so late.

I MISS AINUL and the moments we used to get so mad at her for buying cheap ice to chew JUST LIKE THAT!!

I MISS SHAFIQ for all the times we bicker when we sit under the big canteen tree when school is out before we wait to go home.

I MISS AIMAN and the times we have awkward moments walking back from school and also the time he taught me to cross the hella-big road.

I MISS FAWWAZ and the times when we used to be close that we can talk to each other easily.

I MISS SHAHIR for he was the one who grew up with me and always giving me help when I ask for it.

I MISS MICHELLE and her big eyes every time she comes over to our tables and always have something to tell.

I MISS ROOBEN with his big hearty smile and jokes he always seem to have.

I MISS AARON for every time making me feel like I am a freak for befriending a freak like him. aahhaha.

I MISS MARCUS and his spiky hair and glasses always putting a smile on his face whenever he talks to me.

I MISS IFFAH and the times she comes over to our tables and share with us interesting stories and laughs. She had a lot of those!

I MISS WAN SI for always having an honest smile and for never judging.

I MISS SONIA for our short moments coming and going to school calling each other with bad names and even have our own secret greetings.

I MISS ADLINA and the time we shared a room together and the time she changed my whole perception of her and the time I started to love her.

I MISS AZFAR and the little jokes we used to share that was never really that funny in the first place.

I MISS ADILAH for knowing that I could click with someone new that instantly and how easy it came.

I MISS FARAH and all the crazyness she instilled in me until I agreed to make her my wife.

I MISS PRAGASH for making me feel safe and happy and grateful to know he has my back when I need him.

I MISS IZZATI for making me see who I really am.

I MISS SYAHIRAH for just being there and being so fun and funny to be around and teaching me all these korean bands that I would have never cared to know.

I MISS NASHRAH and the jokes and the time we shared our kuey teow soup sekolah and having fun running club setia.

I MISS SHAFIQ TENGKU for the times we danced our own "Oh God Is Great" song and loosening me up.

I MISS OMAR and I don't know why. Maybe because he really proved himself when he managed Setia Club and let me worked with someone very dedicated, and weird at the same time.

I MISS NASRIFF for the times we used to share making fun of each other and how we grew together to make me see how matured we became.

I MISS RAJA for making me realize that I need to mature and that people change.

I MISS MELISA because of how much we shared in form 3 and how she is always patient with whatever I throw at her.

I MISS NABILAH and our literally crazy moments sharing brownies and drawing ugly literature components.

I MISS SU FERN and the times she infects us all with laughs until the teacher threathened us to take back her brownies.

I MISS WAWAN for giving me the reason to always come for English Literature's tuition class. ;D

I MISS LYNN and knowing that I can be friends with someone for that long.

I MISS SHAEN and even though we were not best friends when he left, I know that we are when he comes back.

I MISS MY SETIA BUDDIES for making me realize the kinds of people I don't like in this world, but at the same time, have the most fun to work with.

I MISS MY YEP BUDDIES for the times we have in the hot stuffy meetings and winning them all!!

I MISS MY PENGAKAP BUDDIES for knowing that such different kinds of people can make a team.

I MISS MY FORM 4 BUDDIES for making me feel like I am a person they can look up to even though they might not.

I MISS MY CLASSMATES and the times they always make me feel like I can be myself and stand up with my craziness all these years.

I MISS MY IACT BUDDIES for the times we had out-beating each other and still have laughs and lunch together.

I MISS MR. JAACOB for being the coolest most understanding teacher in the world.

I MISS MRS. FLORA for the brownies and the patience with the excessive laughs and the time we watched the movie at her house.

I MISS PUAN SAADAH for being so stern and motherly to us and still believed that we all could be the best.

I MISS CIKGU ZAMZURI for being so lame and the times we make fun of each other and didn't treat us as students but as his friends.

I MISS PUAN LIM BEE LAI and her owh so cute personality.

I MISS MR. SIM just for being himself, the very funny and blur teacher yet still so full of knowledge and FUN.

I MISS AZMAN and the fun times that we never really had with each other. ahhaha.

I MISS CHONG YONG for we always consult each other in classes and prove the teacher wrong sometimes also getting busted together for not doing our homework.

I MISS BASIL for I can smile just by looking at his face.

I MISS NICHOLAS and the times he'll always freak out when I become overly happy in tuition classes.

I MISS WHATS HIS NAME and the times he thinks he's being cool when in reality he's really lame.

I MISS SHASHA for the times we were so close in standard 5 until form 1.

I MISS AZLIKHA and the times she came over to my house and that moment when we exchanged phone numbers when we were 7.

I MISS ZAHRA and the times she showed me the true meaning of CRAZY.

I MISS SANGEETA and her long hair and funny accent.

I MISS FARAH LIYANA and I dont know why.

I MISS SHAHRUL and the times he let me miss him.

- I started crying during Mr. Sim's line if you can believe it.

upDATE

UPDATE NUMBER ONE:
I am fat. Period.

My mother always say that I have a lot of my dads genes compared to any of my siblings. It never bothered me really. I don't mind having the eyes and Pakistan feel to my look. Okay the excessive hair has always been a problem but now that I matured, it doesn't really matter anymore.

Until now. Because now I am fat. My dad's siblings are a little bit on the plus size and I am in fear now as there is a possibility of me becoming like them. Of course a few people who are concerned and have noticed this change often remind me to watch my diet and go exercise. I usually push them off and make it as if they were purposely trying to insult me. I know it's wrong and that they are only doing it to help me out but I don't know, I just haven't been HIT yet. This happened before and I instantly went into an all high diet to get back my figure. It worked and I am glad and that is why my mind is thinking for itself believing that I have to wait for the HIT to do something about it. And that is very dangerous. So I am hoping to get the HIT soon or you can down the street and be ashamed of having a FAT friend.



UPDATE NUMBER TWO:
I am starting my very own business.

You'd probably read that last line and go "say what?" but I am serious. I have been brainstorming ways to earn some money so I can go shopping (yes I am blowing them all off on shopping) and Shahrul has advised me against working at fast food joints or other related stores with the simple reason that we are to start college in a little longer than a month. He wants to spend as much time with me and me with my friends before we are to be separated. That is when I got an idea to start my own business.

Job One : I am going into a graphic designing business. I will get 'upah' to design cards and posters and such for school students or anyone who needs them. I have no idea on how much of a hit it will be but I would love to do that as I love designing.

Job Two : In case that doesn't turn out too well, I have also decided to start a Cookie Business. Kind of like Girl Scouts selling cookies to raise some money. I'm raising MY money and Miza has agreed to help me out to make and sell them. I hope this one will be a hit even at least for one session only.

Job Three : My brother has started taking up guitar lessons. Only to tell my mom a month after that that he wants to learn playing the bass. So my mother signed him up for a bass lesson and has so called hired me to teach him the rest of the basic Classical Guitar stuff that he needs to know. RM50 per month. Not that much but I will try to buck it up although that means spending a flat 2 hours teaching my brother the guitar.

Job Four : (yes there is job number four) My auntie has decided to hire me as a part time cleaner. Every Thursday of every week I am to go to her Sunway Condominium and clean out the place. I had already scored my first RM50 cleaning the place and it wasn't that hard so I am SO opting for easy RM50 every week.


Now I know the timing is so weird what with me starting school soon. What school!? WHO KNOWS!!?? I just know the intakes are coming in soon and that I have to spend as much time with my friends as possible before they all go places and leave me. I mena Azfar is already going off to Australia next year. Sigh.

Well I'll keep updating later.

- this is the season of lovin' ;p